Painting critique

[jana.gaul]

Dear all, would be grateful for critique to identify why this painting “doesn‘t work“. Many thanks!

• This topic was modified 3 years, 12 months ago by jana.gaul.
• This topic was modified 3 years, 12 months ago by jana.gaul.

[sboydn]

I think it IS working!  It’s an appealing design, and I really like the soft light.  If I were to choose a few things that could be improved, though, I’d go with these:

1. The head seems somewhat large–or at least, the arms look too short in relation to it (hard to change now, though!).
2. The hand that’s on her knee is a bit shapeless; it could use more structure.
3.  I’m sure the radiator (?) below the window was actually there, but I feel its detail is unnecessary and distracting.  I think the design would be stronger if you painted that out, which should be a relatively simple alteration.
4.  I’d suggest a little more punch at the center of interest, her face–maybe intensify the color there?

Hope this helps!

[Laura Ramsden]

This is so good!! I think maybe the highlight on her left eye is a little too bright? I wonder if moving her slightly to the right would make any difference? But it really is awesome! I love the atmosphere of the piece, and the subtle blues and orange. Kind of want to know what she’s thinking about.

[Annie Survis]

I think this is beautiful! The sense I get when I look at it is that maybe the figure is a little too centered? If she was shifted a little bit to one side, and maybe down a bit, I wonder if the flow would be better?

She’s very lovely though. I love the soft light and dreamy quality. Thank you for sharing!

[jana.gaul]

Hi Sboydn, many thanks for the very useful ideas! I never realized that the head/arms relation seem to be incorrect, but now that you say it – I think you are right. That maybe why the head always looked so awkward to me :-). Many thanks

[jana.gaul]

Hi Laura, Annie, many thanks for your very helpful feedback! I probably change the format of the canvas and reposition the figure.  I tried a golden ratio format canvas for this painting and positioned the face where golden ration lines intersect. However, I think it didn‘t do the job to harmonize and strengthen the composition. I although  struggle with the large very dark area at the bottom – which is maybe not required.

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